While you were sleeping…

My little man went to hospital last week.
Nothing life-threatening or urgent, but you know how us mums worry nonetheless.
There would be anaesthetic involved – something I have an irrational fear of – and an overnight stay would be required.
I fretted, and fussed and kept myself awake for a week beforehand. So silly for something so routine, but so typically me.

Noah has suffered dreadfully with sleep apnea and night terrors for over a year now. The cause of the apnea anyway, has been his massive tonsils, and so it was decided that they had to come out.
We went for a pre-assessment appointment, toured the children’s ward, and Mr Noah told everyone he met how excited he was to be going for a ‘sleepover’ in the hospital. Aren’t children so innocent? So blissfully unaware. So much braver than us big kids – I could feel the panic rising.

Because it’s hard to let go of your little one. Hard to leave them in the hands of some doctor who is just a face, behind a name, behind a scribble on their ward chart. Hard to see them poked and prodded and told not to eat when they want to, and then encouraged to when their throat is sore and raw and inflamed.
It’s bloody hard.

The nurses were lovely, the doctors were lovely, the anaesthetist was lovely. And still I paced, and furrowed my brow, and almost ran to the recovery room when they called me.
Of course, they do this every day.  Me? Not so much.

But he was absolutely, perfectly fine. Despite his quizzical little expression and that oh so tiny hand tightly gripping mine, he had sailed through it. He ate toast like he was told to, was playing DS and finding Where’s Wally in a matter of hours.
Children are resilient. Sick when they’re sick, but not one’s for wallowing. 

My baby boy is that in a nutshell.

Mr M and I had raved beforehand about how amazing hospital toast tastes, and he even offered me a little of his afterwards, breaking a piece off and silently pushing it against my lips.
Even in the worst of times, my Noah, you are adorable.

A week on, and he is a little up and down still – the night terrors are still occurring, but his breathing is so much easier. He has a slump around lunchtime every day, and the nights are tough, but given how sore his throat looks, I don’t blame him in the slightest.
He is a little soldier, battling on whilst building Lego. He reserves his smiles to let me know he’s doing OK.
I’m not so sure I’d be that passable if it were me.

Noah, you are a darling. The kindest, sweetest sickling of them all.
Well done, little man, for being so brave. You faced it all with much more courage than I did.

I love you very, very much.

Mummy xx

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19 Comments

  1. April 23, 2014 / 8:27 am

    Oh bless him and you. That may be routine but it doesn’t stop it being stressful or painful. I wish you both well xx

  2. April 23, 2014 / 8:27 am

    Oh your brave little man, I’m in tears (quite a frequent occurrence with my hormones at the mo) such a lovely post. Kids really are more resilient than us aren’t they? Hope you’re ok, I think I’d be in pieces but it is good that you can see an improvement already. I had my tonsils and adenoids out at age 3 and never understood, before becoming a mummy, how scary that must have been for my mum! All the best to you and your brave little soldier xx #sharewithme

  3. April 23, 2014 / 8:58 am

    Oh bless you, sob. This is beautiful and what a little trooper. I know I’d be exactly like you in this situation. Hope he’s feeling much better soon xxx

  4. April 23, 2014 / 9:19 am

    Aww! Bless him and you!! What a little star! Kids are so resilient!!
    Hospital toast does taste so good doesn’t it…hehehe x

  5. April 23, 2014 / 10:20 am

    Aww bless him! I hope he gets better soon I think I would react the same way too having had many childhood operations I would be a bag of nerves #sharewithme

  6. April 23, 2014 / 10:42 am

    Ohhhhhh em! This made me do a little tear! Xoxo

  7. April 23, 2014 / 11:35 am

    Awww sounds like he is being really brave bless him. I know how hard it is to have a child have surgery, my daughter was rushed to hospital with pneumonia when she was 9 months old, it was the most scary and stressful time of my life yet she would sit playing with toys like there was nothing wrong, blissfully unaware of the fluid building up around her lung and the fact that she would have to have surgery to drain the fluid away. Leaving her in the operating theatre was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do and I hope I never have to do that again but she was fine and recovered really quickly. It really is amazing how resilient children are 🙂 xxx

  8. April 23, 2014 / 2:40 pm

    What a gorgeous post and I am glad that he is ok. What a brave little man. It may have been routine, but as parents every day is a worry let alone things out of the ordinary. Hopefully he will be better going forward from now on. x

  9. April 23, 2014 / 3:04 pm

    Well done little man for being so brave for mommy and the rest of the family. I bet you were so scared and worried I would have been the same emma. Any mommy would. Bless him. I hope he has a full recovery soon and is back to himself and that those horrible night terrors go away. So sorry he has them. operations on adults is scary but on children is twice as bad I can relate. I felt sick and couldn’t sleep for a week with buba when he got his finger cut almost off and had to surgically put it back on. In the paris hospital on vacation for three days it was awful. Glad the nurses took care of him so well. That helps. Thank you so much for linking up to Share With Me #sharewithme xoxo

  10. April 23, 2014 / 3:34 pm

    Thinking of you all and wishing Noah a fast recovery with a better nights sleep. I am sure the girls are keeping him entertained! I remember having my tonsils out back in the day when you went in on a Monday, operated on Tuesday, made to eat rice crispies on a Wednesday with little milk and got out on a Friday. As a mother now I dread to think what I would be like, even when they are sick I fret and worry. Take care x

  11. April 23, 2014 / 5:08 pm

    Oh Emma, poor wee Noah and poor wee you. I can understand you’re worry, jeepers, I worry when they have ear or throat infections! I really hope he makes a super recovery and gets relief from these night terrors soon. We’ll have a LARGE glass later 😉 xx

  12. April 23, 2014 / 5:11 pm

    Oh bless him. It is so hard when they go under for anything and it takes them such a while to recover that you can’t help worrying. Hope he is back to normal soon. He is gorgeous xxx

  13. April 23, 2014 / 8:10 pm

    Awww..get well soon Noah. This is such a sweet post. My son has got night terrors too that he got from his dad. It is still bearable but he never had a night where he slept uniterrupted by it. =( #sharewithme

  14. April 23, 2014 / 8:40 pm

    Oh Emma, what a brave little man. You must be so proud, hope he makes a full recovery really soon xx

  15. April 23, 2014 / 9:57 pm

    Aw Emma – nothing more scary than seeing your little one going into hospital – what a brave boy! I hope the night terrors tail off very soon for him. X #sharewithme

  16. April 24, 2014 / 9:14 am

    Oh gosh this has me welling up! What a brave little boy Noah is! Well done you too for coping it must be so scary even for something “routine” as you say its definitely not something routine for us!! Poor little guy having night terrors, sending him lovely warm beach-y dreams xxxx

  17. April 24, 2014 / 10:45 pm

    Oh bless him what a brave boy! I would have been exactly the same as you , terrified of mine going under anesthetic despite a tiny risk.
    Hoping he feels much better soon as the night terrors subside too. Suck a lovely post Emma x

  18. April 24, 2014 / 11:34 pm

    What a little star, bless him. I’d have been the same as you, can’t imagine watching one of mine head off into theatre. So glad he’s doing better, hope the night terrors ease too x Lovely post Emma xx

  19. April 27, 2014 / 9:51 pm

    Glad the operation went smoothly and he is recovering, I hope he will sleep better soon. My eldest had night terrors, thankfully now at 4 and a half they are rare. (from loving life with little ones)

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